Yay, I’m down to 267 which is still lot by all means but it’s 20 lbs lighter than I was at so I’m happy, I’m not going to give up this time. There are days that I want to ( like today ) but now my mom’s being my biggest supporter and she pushes me. She’s trying to lose weight as well and has been on spark for about 2 months now and has lost 10 lbs which isn’t bad for her at all.

She’s a little under 230 right now and hopes to be at 160 by next year some time.

And it’s awesome, almost makes up for the fact that Wal-Mart.com sucks. Word of advice for using them fucks, USE A SHOPPING CARD so that there is no issues with your bank wanting to verify that it’s you spending the money!

Anyway, I love the fact that I can change the logo on it, I know that’s silly but I just think it rocks and I’ve found out that I burn more calories than I thought, I figured it’d be a bit more but damn what a difference!

Since I’m trying to stay active, honey bought me a new bicycle.

Haven’t given up ,yet. Yay!  I want to be able to do a mile without stopping by October but I need to get outside in order for that to happen. I mean I go outside but I haven’t put the effort forward into trying to run,yet. I will soon, probably when I’m not dripping blood.

my mom has actually started trying to lose weight and I wish her the best, hopefully she’ll stick with it and not quit, same for me!

I’ve been on this lifestyle change since the 8th or so, I don’t want to call it a diet because it’s not, it’s teaching myself how to have proper proportions. Diets are very limiting and shouldn’t ever be used and neither should be a lot of other “quick fat removal” processes only in extreme cases and by the supervision of a doctor.

Anyways, I’m still rolling with; I didn’t work out yesterday because I was feeling sore and I don’t want to push myself and then end up quiting. I don’t know if it’s because it’s so freaking cold in this place or what but I feel tired all the time and that’s been the case since before I starting working, maybe it’s a combination of both being severely overweight and this places being f**king cold!

Honey goes overnight tonight; which is has its good point and it’s bad points. The good points are I can go to the gym when I feel like it during the day and I won’t have to hear him snore which at times are PRETTY bad!  The bad things are he won’t be in the bed when I am and he’ll be up all night on his days off. Hopefully, he can keep it quiet and let me sleep during those days.

It would be easier if the computer was going still going to be in the living room come tomorrow but mom gets hers and I have to move mine back in my room. I have a feeling I’ll be using more of hers until it’s warmer because as of late, I don’t do anything that requires much of my programs. If I need mine, I’ll bundle up with six blankets or so.

Back to losing weight, while most of the people on sparkpeople are pretty level headed, some still have the “dream” to lose 50 lbs in like two months and even though they say they’re “young” and could keep it off doesn’t mean nothing. Losing weight really fast is bad for your body and most people gain it all back plus some. When will people get over the fact that you can not lose LOTS of weight really quick!

While it seems like a grand idea, it’s not healthy nor productive for your body, get over people and do it the right way. You weren’t 130 lbs one day and then 180 in one week, it took a while for your body to go that, it’s going to take a while for you to go back down to your original weight or whatever weight it is you’re shooting for.

I’ve been doing what I can at home to work out; from doing sprints in the front yard to jump roping. I’m also trying to be careful of what I eat because I’m tired of this weight being here and making me a hermit but then again, I’d probably be a hermit even if I was thin. haha

I joined sparkpeople to help me to get the weight off; somewhere I can have a support system because at times my support system at home sucks. Honey does what he can but he’s not ready to lose weight and I can’t force him to but for mom and my uncle - those two are lost causes for the most part. I think that they think or at least mom anyways thinks she’s too old to get in shape. She has so many health issues that it would be her best interest to lose weight and doctors have told her this. My uncle has been told the same thing but he absolutely does not  care what he eats, I can argue with him till I’m blue in the face - he will continue to eat fried foods till the day he dies of a heart attack and I honestly think that last heart attack is fast approaching faster than what he thinks.

Just because some damn water pill is keeping him looking small does not mean he’s healthy by any means. GRR

And there way of thinking sometimes fucks up my efforts on trying to lose weight but I’ve got to stick to it.

The thing that pisses me off the most between those two is that they eat horrendously fattening foods and then want to munch down on my fruits and vegetables - then BITCH when Ricky and I eat some of their food. SCREW THE BOTH OF YOU!

If you want to eat my healthy food; then start buying more food for the house and START doing THINGS MY WAY!

I’m going to utilize the gym I’m paying for tomorrow after I pay a few bills. I’m buying groceries; screw his need for silly little gadgets for his game consoles - those can and will wait if I have anything to do about it.

My goal is to have lost 20 lbs by May 8th and another 30 lbs by October 8th - which would weigh me in at 230 lbs. I have been drinking more water; I bought some Nestle Pure Life yesterday since our R.O water tastes horrible and needs to be changed. ( Here’s hoping mom pays her bill off before they come and take the R.O system away.)

I’m also utilizing an idea from the discovery channel website is to try on a pair of jeans that I can’t button, yet and I have the perfect pair. We’ll call them the O.pants because well that’s who we got them from - Oscar gave Ricky a pair of pants that he didn’t want no more and I think they’re cool but before those pants, I have the army camouflage pants of my uncle’s I want to steal and we’ll call those the G.Pants.  So two pairs of pants that I want to fit my big ass into.

If I can have children; I want to weigh under 200 lbs before I become pregnant. Of course, if I can have children and I were to become pregnant before being under 200 lbs I’d be on cloud 9 BUT I want it as close as possible to my ideal weight if not my ideal weight.

Crosses Fingers and off to work bore myself to death with Tony Little.

I did one of the workouts that you can get when you buy the gazelle and I have to say that Tony is the most boring man on the face of the earth. I finished the fifteen minute workout though but I doubt that I will ever torture myself into watching it again, maybe other than to advance to the 30 minute and 45 minute workouts included - I’m sure there’s a few variations to the full dvd. But for the first 15 minutes for the first two to four weeks, I’ll just opt for some music .

I really want to lose weight and I’m really going to try this time. I clipped some coupons today and I intend to use them when R gets paid to buy some groceries.  I also looked at some exercise equipment - I really want an elliptical but the one I want costs 5000 dollars, so most likely I’ll have to start making an effort into utilizing the gym I pay for each month. The only bad thing about those ellipticals are the time limit on them - 30 minutes at a whack.  If I want to go for an hour, I would like to be able to.

Since, the elliptical is out of the question - I’ll probably opt for an exercise bike or  a slam man - yes , I like the slam man and I want one but it is 100 dollars more than the bike. So, I don’t know.

So, I’m fat and have been for all of my life, I was always the heavy set child in school and I was also almost always the tallest kid my class. So, being the tall and fat kid, I always stuck out like a sore thumb.

So, in taking my “resolution” on with stride; I signed up on Discovery Channel’s National Body Challenge in hopes of keeping up with the weight loss program or whatever you want to call it.

I also signed up on another deal of Discovery Channel’s; I signed me and mom up to be on t.v for support in losing weight. I doubt that we’ll be picked but who knows, we might be and that may be the thing that kicks mom’s determination up and into high gear.

Google has virtually bitch slapped me for wanting to make money thru paid posts, so I hope payperpost comes up with a new solution for the thousands of bloggers that have been cyber bitch slapped by google. I pay for my  hosting and my  domains, it shouldn’t be left up to google on rather or not I can do paid posts on my blogs - I understand that it messes with their “pageranking” but I’m sure more than “payperpost” bloggers sell LINKS on their websites.

Thanks Google for taking some people’s means of extra cash for their children away. It’s all about keeping the small man down and keeping your pockets lined.

don’t you love it when you send someone to go do something and they come back and tell you the people have gone up. Bleah. I just sent Ricky to get the car inspected (live in TX) and the price has gone up a 1.50.  Not much but I was unaware of the price change and hopefully they’ll take credit card.

I still feel like crap and that sucks, I feel like I’ve been coughing up the ewwy gooey stuff for days and nothing is coming of it. If after this venture of store bought drugs don’t work, I guess I’ll give in and go to the hospital and beg for a damn shot instead of  a prescription for f***ing amoxicillin. They start giving that to shit to ya when your young and then by the time you’re 12 you’re basically immune to the crap, thus causing you to stay sicker longer because they keep dishing the crap out. I was getting that junk when I was 12 years old, I just noticed Ricky’s nephew has a huge assed bottle of it with 126 refills, he’s 2 months old. He should be immune to it by the time he’s 3.